Friday, April 30, 2010

Yahoo Just Doesn't Get Me & the Best Shower of Life

Since my e-mail is on Yahoo, I see the yahoo homepage often.
Today's "news" involved Chelsea Clinton and her wedding wish for her dad (I didn't realize brides gave wishes to their dads on their weddings, nor did I click the link to read what her wish was) and some kind of story-link to the blog My Messy Bedroom talking about the hairstyle men love best (I clicked it, but did so with morbid sarcasm)...
Science was dragged unwillingly in to the equation, and I felt very miffed that it was asserted that it was pretty much a fact that "most men" like long hair on women. That is such a vast and sweeping statement! Most men? Which men? Where? That's like saying "most North Americans like bacon". Yes, it's true, bacon is beloved by many, and has even become something of a pop-cultural icon, which is interesting for a meat, but what about vegetarians? what about meat-eating people who don't eat pork for religious reasons? what about people who have high cholesterol and an anti-bacon prescription (although I am sure that some people who are told not to eat bacon like it anyway... maybe this fits into the metaphor as a reference to queer women who are prescribed by Dr.Society not to like women with long hair but some of us do)? What about people who just don't eat bacon because they think bacon is salty, crunchy and weird? What about gay men, what about men who crushed out on Meg Ryan and Agyness Deyn? The author mentions that some women can rock short hairstyles and "still be sexy" (which of course is the damn truth), and closes with an anecdote about gender binary reinforcement in her childhood in the form of some woman thinking she was a boy once when she was 10, she just can't do short hair ever again. I feel like the end statement was sort of like "Yeah, I guess all those people who don't eat bacon exist, but science pretty much shows us that almost everybody likes and eats bacon here in North America. Y'all should eat some bacon."
And that, my friends, is flawed.

In other news, hot water is back and better than ever at my place. This meant the best damn shower I have ever had, and if any of my roommates had been home and within earshot they would have surely assumed I had an econo-sized jug of Herbal Essences in there with me, if you know what I mean.

Earlier this week, things had taken a turn for the awful and horrific in my world, and now they are starting to look back up again. I am hoping that this upward trend is going to continue, as we are not in the clear yet!

Time to go paint some things.


Sunday, April 25, 2010


Ooooh and also I am finally reading "Londonstani" by Guatam Malkani, and having an awesome riveting glimpse into Rudeboy life while at the same time menstruating heavily. Sweet.

Love that musky art scent

Argh, I just spilled my grubby brushwater all over my bedroom floor.
Shows I'm painting with reckless abandon, but it smells musty and now I have to wash extra towels in the laundry tomorrow. (How often do I thank heavens I don't have carpeting in here?)

But, I'm painting, I'm painting!! I feel really alive! Even when I just talk about painting I feel great. I can rarely ever work on just one painting at a time, I am all about the layering of imagery and intent and complex visual thicknesssss. One I have going right now is a mash of a LOT of detail and abstraction and layers, and then there is a 2 canvas figure painting that actually looks really stunning while being pretty calm but with clashy colours. I'm working with erotic undertones in my painting for this show, and it sure shows how much of a loaded, many-layered and multi-faceted that theme can be for many of us and definately is for me!

Looking at themes in my art, going to counselling apointment today and hanging out with my mumsie this evening really feels like a lot of honesty and deep inquiry. Today for me centred in part around looking at my body image from different angles I have been too afraid to go at it from for a long time. It also centred of course on listening to my mom's experience of going to one of her best friends' funeral last week and how that was for her and all the details of being there, going to the same funeral place that my Nana and Papa's ashes are and really visiting her Dead Folks. It also involved hearing so many beautiful stories of what people remember and how people hold it together. Wow.

My mom is super cool and we ate and had a great time. Talked about our current needlecraft projects, (she knits and i crochet), the kinds of cookies we are going to perfect when we have a baking night in honour of her late friend's life (Aunty was a totally cookie master! Even belonged to a cookie swap club), mom's accidental foray into using that intense Got 2b Glued hair product to "give her bangs a little definition"...I was like "oh, gosh they wronged you,mom, they have a special shampoo just for removing that stuff, it's like spike central! razor sharp bangs!" How could the person assisting her at Cosmetic World allow that kind of purchase to happen in good conscience? I used to use it when my hair was about an inch long when I was 16 because it is a great product to make it spikey and faux-ravery but got too pissed with it practically shellacking pieces of loose hair to my hands. Next time they ought to hook a lady up with some POMADE is all I'm saying.

Going to round up my laundry to get an early start on it tomorrow and then scoop kitty litter. What an exciting life!


Friday, April 23, 2010

C, as in 'cat'!, R, as in ...'raisin'...W as in 'wind'?...

Alright, Blog Fans!
As promised, I am blogging this evening, and what news, what news!!

As a fully grown adult I am employing the "Holy impromptu hostess, Batman!" powers of Dial-a-Bottle for the first time ever. Trying to spell the name of my street for the dispatcher guy made me realize that I would be absolutely useless as a HAMM radio operator or in any kind of emergency spelling situation. Alpha, Charlie, Bravo, I'm good. After that, I start doing free-association and end up with words like "wind" and "fraction" and slap myself in the forehead. They will definitely be checking our ID when they arrive.

In other news, I had a little art supply mini-shopping spree today, as I have suddenly confirmed that I will be having an art show in June! More details to follow, but all I can say at the moment is that my mind is overflowing with images and joy and ideas and inspiration! I got a sampler pack of a bunch of different kinds of acrylic mediums and I am really excited to try them all out, especially the "pouring medium", which I have no idea how to use but think will be totally useful for painting lava lamps or melting things, should the need arise! Also, clear gesso? Who has ever heard of such a revolutionary idea? I'm trying not to pee myself with excitement (so far my efforts are going well). I can't wait for bright colours to blossom onto canvases, including but not limited to FLUORESCENT YELLOW, Pthalo blue, magenta and purpley grey! eeeee!

I really hate what microwaves do to bread. You have to eat your heated bread (in the form of pizza, leftover sandwiches, defrosted bagels) real fast, when it is still molten, and if you don't it gets chewy and just awful! I already don't trust microwaves, but my distaste is magnified during these meal-reheats.

My new eyeliner makes me internally sing Le Tigre:
"I'll make some coffee/ put on some eyeliner/ I think I'll find that/ Things are fine (and they're gonna get MUCH/ FINER!)/ Do you wanna stay in bed all day?/[yeah!]/ Do you remember feelin' any other way? [NO!]//

peace out for now!


Monday, April 12, 2010

It ain't over till it's over...and then it is and I wish it weren't

I just finally got to the end of Valmiki's Daughter, by Shani Mootoo, who I adore.
I am sad.
Blame it on forgetting to take my mood meds for 2 days, or blame it on me being an overly-invested reader with high demands for an ending that makes me feel better about the world, but I'm freakin' sad. Yelling "WHY? Why Snoofy, WHYYY?" from my room is not helping the logical conclusion of the book to stop stinging my soul.
After work yesterday I was a bit of an open wound, and I thought I could maybe retreat into the book and hope Viveka (one of the main characters) could be an extension of me in the fictional world and maybe something great would happen to her.
Spoiler alert:

not so much.

Friday, April 9, 2010

New blog thing: Bathroom Connoisseur

I'm a detail-noticer. I'm pretty observant regarding new arrangements of objects in a familiar place, gorgeous and/or striking eyebrows on strangers, and the details of public washrooms, to name a few.

When I go to a new place, such as a shop, restaurant, coffee place or bar, I always notice the restrooms. Are they noteworthy? Accessible? Clean? Are they gendered? What's the decor like? How do I dry my hands? Is the light switch hard to find?

So, why not fill others in on my observations? Here I am with "Bathroom Connoisseur", an unsolicited new addition to this blog.

Today, I went to the new Smoke's Poutinerie in my work neighbourhood, and after drawing the top half of Kermit the Frog on their chalk board and eating some fairly delicious poutine, I decided to check out their washroom.

It's downstairs, as so many restrooms are, and thus not accessible to anyone for whom stairs are a barrier. A lack of banister also made me feel like I could plummet to the bottom easily, but I braced myself using the walls. Considering the logo for Smoke's is a stencil/silkscreen-esque graphic of some fella's face that is plastered everywhere (including on t-shirts of the folks who work there), I was pleasantly surprised to discover that said fella's face was not in the bathroom, watching me pee. In fact, the downstairs portion is all white, blank and kind of mini.

There are two onesie bathrooms which are "not" gendered...Both rooms' signs have the dress woman and pants man symbols on them and say "Washroom" on them, denoting that either is fine. (I give mega-happy points to signs that just say "washroom" or some kind of variation therein without any kinds of images of binary gendered people and their clothing, so I'll give this one out of two thumbs up).
There were no mirrors in the room, which is neither here nor there, given that it is not the kind of eatery where many things could be stuck in your teeth.

The lights go on automatically, which is nice, since that's one less switch to touch and a lot less energy being wasted when nobody is in the room.

Foam soap dispenser, paper towel and an inward opening door are the last things I recall, and then I left and went to the art store and bought some glue and gesso.

I hope to bring you slightly more interesting bathroom news soon. Perhaps it's time for me to go to Marchet (now known as Richtree?) in the financial district again because their bathrooms have always inspired awe in me (mostly the decor...more on that later).

Off to go paint!

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

some bedtime poems, specifically: weak haiku

1. (En-route to brush my teeth)

fuzzy-eyed wee hours
Cat sighing at her dry food
seafoam crochet blob

2. (What I am pondering)

wrapping mind around
semiotics of clothing:
express myself nude?

3. (What I am wearing)

glorious stubble
mustard yellow capri pants
Stevie Wonder's face

Monday, April 5, 2010


Sun is shinin'
took my pills
time to decorate some 'sills!

No more winter snowfolk faces
buds and blossoms in their places

sunshine, sparkles, vibes and toys
to celebrate spring's sexy joys

need some fabric, tulle and foil
maybe even potting soil?

A joyous task I'll ne'er renounce!
Time to get crackin', Sequin OUT, let's BOUNCE!

Friday, April 2, 2010

Your urns smell like LewisCraft

Hey, what's up, internet? You scramble my brain but you're still alright.

I feel like I haven't been blogging fearlessly enough. My so-called blogger "dashboard" (woah!) says I have 12 posts on here, but several of those are abandoned drafts! I need to stop abandoning drafts for fear that they are boring or pointless. Many of my favourite bloggers sure don't let that stop them, and I don't mean that in the backhanded-compliment way it sounds! Some things are awesome because they are exciting, but not every single moment can be covered in neon rays of flashing wondrousness - some things are awesome because they are just real life and folks can relate to that.

Without further ado: My Day, Exuding REALNESS.

I tried to wake up at a decent hour this morning, because as I mentioned I am trying to get onto a sleep schedule that relates more directly to being alive when the sun is out. My BFF, who has been (and from here on out shall continue to be) referred to here as "Snoof", has been helping me out in this department, as I like her more than my alarm clock and therefore feel more excited to wake up and hang out with her than with a clock. Finally got up at 9:30 with minimal shouting from Snoof in the living room ("[Sequin Brown]! I'm alone in the living room with our coffees!!") and after a terrifyingly unhealthy breakfast of sour cream n onion chip remnants and Starbux Via instant coffee, I decided to listen to some Riot Grrrl music and work on a couple of paintings I've been meaning to tweak.

After that good time, plus a shower, Snoof took us out for ice cream to reward herself, and by lucky extension me, for having made several pages of notes for one of her many papers due in the next few days. After this joy, I got on the subway to go see my counselor, which is one hell of a transit ride out to the lovely 'burbs, had a decent session and hauled my arse back to the mainland to have a secular Good Friday dinner with my Mom.

We laughed, we caught up on life, mocked all the new developments in makeup application we noticed in Fashion magazine (honestly, roll-on foundation, spherical mascara wands and...vibrating mineral powder???) and drank zinfandel! Mom made some fabulous lasagna and brownies, 'cause we like things non-traditional that way. We surfed the net together, looking at really old photos of her parents and cousins that my uncle scanned and e-mailed her. I also introduced her to, which I figured she might get a kick out of if only for the entries where etsy sellers' spelling and grammar mistakes are picked on - she's a stickler for that sort of thing, and she likes crafts, to boot. "Fugly" seemed to be my mom's unofficial Favourite Slang Word to Use With Caution in 2006 or thereabouts, so I needed to hook her up with some fugly craft commentary.

This led us to gripe harmlessly about the new urns that "decorate" the front entrance of her (formerly "our") apartment building...they're big, they're gaudy and they're full of a combo of dried and fake plant matter that smells like spray glue and florist's foam. False pears and red spray painted pussy willows jut out at all angles and threaten to poke out visitors' eyes. Before I left, we spent a lot of time looking for the area on my totally unflattering but sensational sweater that I could have sworn had a polka-dotting error. Maybe I was hallucinating last time I wore it, but I really thought one of the shoulders had been knit with a few toonie-sized dots missing. I love my mom.

In closing, I noticed that being constantly connected through social technology like Facebook and text messaging makes me way more anxious and skews my already flawed sense of time. I find myself mentally rehashing sent e-mails and wondering where I went wrong if I don't receive relatively immediate responses. Because of this, I sometimes feel like a paper-bag puppet with extra-large googlie eyes: crinkly, ridiculous and wiggly.